Every single one of us who lives, dreams! Every person’s dream is unique to themsevles, yet every healthy dream has a happy ending. No one wants tragedies. We might dream of a beautiful house, car of the latest model, the newest iphone, pretty shoes, a trip around the world, a room full of makeup, to be a famous star, even simple things such as a cup of warm coffee in a cold night, a shoulder to lean on when we feel hurt, a surprise visit by a dear friend, the joy of seeing our kids succeed, the giddy feeling when someone hugs us suddenly, the elevated feeling on winning a competition, the peace that surrounds us when all the family is sitting together calmly and the list never ends.
Hollywood cashes on this human weakness and makes us feel through its productions that “dreams come true”. Hardly any child is ignorant of the stories of princesses and the dreams that materialized for them eventually, stories that pass on from generation to generation. Some teach their kids to dream about other things and the kids even when they grow up into adults, still hold that childhood dream close to their heart.
In every dream that each one of us has, the common factor is not just happiness but immortality. The “Happily Ever After”. However, we all live in a world of deception. This world does not have “ever afters”. The most happiest and richest guy dies too after completing his term on the planet.
But wait, don’t let your dreams be shattered so soon. Dream on! But of the place where “happily ever afters” are the norm. Yes, dream of Paradise! Where you will never die, your loved ones will never die, where no one hates anyone, where love and joy bloom 24/7. The place where there will be palaces made of gold, silver and pearls. There will be gardens full of the most exotic fruits. Your favourite dish will come right in front of you right then and there. There will be greenery and beauty and sparkly streams flowing here and there. Where we will wear dresses of silks with the finest jewellery, and look so regal. Spouses there will be crazily in love and absurdly good to each other. It will be a place, free of exams and taunts and sad news. No jealousy or ill-will with anyone. We will recline comfortably on fluffly pillows and joke and laugh over delicious snacks. (InshaAllah).
This is Paradise! Just thinking of it makes your mouth water and you wish fervently to have your name written in its inhabitants. But nothing of value was ever achieved without a hefty price. And so Paradise comes with its own set of requirements, the most basic of which is believing in the One true God, Allah and not associating partners with Him.
However, there are many other factors as well, some of which make you more eligible for this heavenly land and others which make you ineligible. We will be considering only one of the factors right now that could prevent us from going into Paradise. You get rid of that obstacle and up your chances! :)
Before we go on, we must talk about the scary part. Ineligibility to go into Paradise means eligibility for the Great Fire, which will burn and torture and agonize beyond limits. It is either this end for us or that end, nothing in between.
We find in Sahih Bukhari, 3241:
Narrated `Imran bin Husain:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “I looked at Paradise and found poor people forming the majority of its inhabitants; and I looked at Hell and saw that the majority of its inhabitants were women.”
Women! In hellfire! Why? We find the explanation in another place.
Sahih Bukhari, 29:
Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas:
The Prophet SAW said, “I was shown the Hell-fire and that majority of its dwellers were women who were ungrateful.” It was asked, “Do they disblieve in Allah?” (Or are they ungrateful to Allah?) He replied, “They are ungrateful to their husbands and are ungrateful for the favors and the good (charitable deeds) done to them. If you have been always been good (benevolent) to one of them and then she sees something in you (not of her liking), she will say, ‘I have never received any good from you.”
Ingratitude! We women suffer from this. Ungratefulness to husbands and also on favours conferred upon us. We have a natural disposition to complain and to get overemotional on a slight affliction and thus declare in the depths of pity and misery that this “always” happens, “nothing” goes right “ever”. We tend to use absolutes which are lies in and of itself. Because that affliction just came, it does not wipe out all the good that we have in our lives.
This ungrateful attitude not only makes our husbands suffer and feel sad but also plunges us in misery. And it makes Allah displeased as well. Why lose that beautiful Paradise over petty things?
Together, we can change this attitude inshaAllah. Instead of acting as fuel to the fire when our friends share our problems with us, we will redirect their attention to the good in their lives. Try to stay away from trashy negative literature and soaps. Whatever we see, read or think, influences us. We can make a list each night before sleeping in our phones or notepads of the 3 things that were good in my life today. And 3 things that I’m grateful for to my husband. Thinking more of the good all day will also help us control our tongues when feeling sentimental. Eventually this will lead to us being grateful to our Creator. Not only will it increase our chances of going into Paradise but also make our own little home in this world heavenly and peaceful. <3
Allah says, “If you are grateful, I will surely increase you [in favor]”. (14:7)
And Allah’s promises are true! :)
P.S. This hadith acts as a warning and sincere advice to women to correct their ways when there is still time. At other places, men have been reprimanded too with regards to their behaviour. This is not discrimination as some label it to be. Remeber, Allah is just and in terms of good deeds and bad deeds, men and women are treated equally.