Light Up Your Life With Islam

Posts tagged ‘parents’

The Shield 

Bismillah. 

One of the purest love that exists in this world is that of parents for their children. They love their kids selflessly and would go to any length to protect and benefit them. They’d even sacrifice their life for them. What could be greater than that?

If a child becomes ill, the father and mother would do whatever is humanly possible for them to do. Everyone gives their own opinion and advice regarding the child’s illness and they listen to each one hungrily, because who knows what will work? And same goes for all the matters of life. They want the best for their offspring. 

Well, here’s the good news! 

  

I’m about to share a formula which is 100% tried and tested by the prophets themselves. Imagine that! 


Sahih Bukhari, 3371:


Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas:

The Prophet (ﷺ) used to seek Refuge with Allah for Al-Hasan and Al-Husain and say: “Your forefather (i.e. Abraham) used to seek Refuge with Allah for Ishmael and Isaac by reciting the following: ‘O Allah! I seek Refuge with Your Perfect Words from every devil and from poisonous pests and from every evil, harmful, envious eye.’ “

The dua in Arabic: 

أَعُوذُ بِكَلِمَاتِ اللَّهِ التَّامَّةِ مِنْ كُلِّ شَيْطَانٍ وَهَامَّةٍ، وَمِنْ كُلِّ عَيْنٍ لاَمَّةٍ ‏”‏‏.‏

Let’s add this dua in our routinely supplications for protection of our beloved ones. You can make this dua for them whether they’re with you or live far away. It will benefit inshaAllah. :)

High School Teens – in a mess or taken amiss?

Bismillah.

Ever looked in the eyes of young teenagers of high school in Pakistan? The kids who are just growing up, feeling the changes within them and around them. Looking here and there in a questioning way without getting any answers. Or do you just ignore them like a bunch of silly sheep bleating loudly?

Where are their parents? The most important characters in a person’s life. Do they help them get on? Sadly, no.
Parents don’t tell them anything. They think stuff is understood, or they don’t want to tell it to their children (not knowing that they know everything already the wrong way, since you didn’t tell the right way). They don’t understand that today kids need direct counseling. A one-to-one talk. With all the different kinds of mess outside, they’re confused. And no affectionate elder is there in the family to guide them. Or even to whom they can go and talk to. The only thing elders do is put restrictions on every possible thing so kids don’t fall into bad (the conservative parent) or they let them do everything so they don’t fall into good (the liberal parent). Someone seriously needs to counsel parents, and also tell them:
Let. Them. Do. Everything. Within. The. Boundaries. Of. Halal. And. Save. Them. From. Sin.
This is what the parents need to know. Or a good shaking is all they need.

Then there’s the school. What’s taught there? Just a bunch of subjects utterly useful for handling life. Some biological systems, a few chemical reactions, mathematical equations, formulas of physics, outdated English stories that bore you to death, Urdu poems of unfulfilled love, structure of computers, history of how Pakistan was stabbed here and there by various regimes, and the list goes on for other such subjects. Okay. These are good. But are these good enough?
No lessons on how to streamline your thinking, discover the Creator, handle your emotions, manage pressure and hormonal changes, discover your hidden talent and be given a purposeful direction? What if someone’s skill is maintaining a perfect routine? Or talking to others convincingly? Or creating wonders out of imagination? What’s in schools to dig out and enhance the natural skills unique to each being and let them pursue those with ease?

Look at the teachers. Or don’t. Most of them are not worth looking at (I don’t say all). My apologies for the bitter truth but that’s how it is. Teachers of high schools are not the best people of this society, unfortunately. The female teachers being interested only in fashion, gossip, shopping, bossing around and the male teachers being interested in flirting with the female teachers, cracking silly jokes and both of them teach to earn a little money or because they’re bored at home and just because they well, have to teach.
No improving of minds, no provision of inspiration or high ideals, no nothing. Just a bunch of silly people who if they do fill ideas in minds are only those ideas which would have been better if not shared at all.

The company and friends consequently is the worst imaginable. Kids fill their heads with romantic novels, films full of violence, hot gals, cool guys, porn on the internet, and silly jokes.

What is the solution? Who will bridge the communication gap? Talk and counsel them? Help them get a direction? Help them stop wasting the most precious years of their life?

The question is who?

Wassalam,
Hajrah.

Are You a Concerned Parent?

Assalam u ‘alaikum.
Bismillah.

A lot of time Muslim parents or concerned elders want to know the kind of fun and enjoyment to have with their families which is not against the pure Islamic values, and would fill their house with peace and barakaah.

So, here are a few tips of halal entertainment. Share your own ideas in the comments section below.

  • Put up a new verse or hadith every day in your house. Fix turns for kids and let them compete each day that whose verse or hadith was more interesting. Hang a small white board on a central wall, for this purpose. Or put it next to the dining table or wherever your family gathers for, say, breakfast so that everyone can read it and benefit from it.
  • Inculcate in yourself the habit of reading. Kids would automatically follow your example and settle down with books when they see you reading. And this habit would then benefit them for their lifetime.
  • Plant vegetables or flowers in your garden, with kids. Nowadays children are so used to ordering food that they don’t even know where the ingredients come from. Let them know it. They’d get a sense of achievement that we helped dad or mom with growing this and now it’s ready to eat. Plus they’d learn that food does not appear in a wink. It’s a whole growing process. And they’ll also learn how Allah brings life in a dead seed. Moreover, it would be healthier to eat.
    Take them on nature walks. Or hiking. Do this on a one-on-one basis too and you’ll also get time to talk with them and know them better. Take a walk with your parents too.
  • Let the young boys lead salah every now and again. For teaching purposes and for developing a sense of responsibility in them. Produce imams in your house.
    Umar r.a used to wake up his whole family for tahajjud. Wake your family for tahajjud and Fajr. This would be the real love.
  • Travel with your family, to know Allah. Go to places and learn collectively.
  • Whenever you eat out, give charity with it, in the form of food. If you have something of Rs. 1000, give food out worth Rs. 500 (or more). Let the children calculate how much we owe to the poor people this time.
  • Play sports and involve kids in it too. For boys specially, target shooting and riding are really good. Don’t let them be couch potatoes. Play with them.
  • Give them Islamic education. Teach them all about Islam (not just basics) at home, and also try to send them to Islamic schools.
  • Get involved in da’wah, as a family. Dawah includes giving out books, DVDs, letters, emails, text messages, one-to-one talks, lectures etc. Children will start doing da’wah at their own level.
  • Visit friends and family, especially for da’wah purposes.
  • Volunteer with charity organizations. Clean out the cupboards and give out extra stuff every 6 months. Teach this to children too. Tell them to sort out their extra toys every 6 months. Teach them that Allah will replace it with something much better.
  • Take the kids to different lectures and halaqahs. Take the boys to the masjid (even for Fajr salah).
  • Watch good, healthy movies and documentaries with them. (Check them first and don’t leave it unsupervised). Like Universe series etc. Ones that are actually eman-boosters.

Taken from Br. Raja Zia ul Haq.
Follow him on his blog:
 http://rajazia.blogspot.com/

Wassalam.

Love & Rahmah – Revive it, Parents!

Salam,
Bismillah.

There was a very moving reminder given by brother Hamza Andreas Tzortzis at SIST on January 8, 2012. I would like to share it with you.

This is the summary of what he talked about (these may not be the exact words but I’m still going to use the first form so that it can be related to easily, they are almost the exact words though):
My dad used to say ‘I love you’ to me every single day. (His dad is a non-Muslim). Wallahi I can guarantee you that some of you have never heard the word love from your parents. We’re Muslims, this is our agenda… Rahmah! Ibn-al-Qayyim said where you see Islam you should see mercy. And I guarantee you some of you in this room don’t even have loving relationships with your own parents. This is not the relationship of the sunnah, of parenting. Children have to obey their parents. It’s a must. It’s an ‘ibadah. But don’t forget the emphasis Islam puts on rahmah in relationships. What does Allah say about Nabi s.a.w? If you didn’t show love to them they would run away from you. Think about this. Think about did I say I love him?

‘I love you.’ Such a beautiful words. Its sunnah. What did the Prophet s.a.w say? If you love someone tell them. Do we not love our children? Of course we do. So why don’t we say it? If we don’t have rahmah in our house then according to developmental psychology you have nothing no matter what else you give your children. We don’t show love, we don’t show rahmah. Why? Remember it’s all about parenting. And you’re future parents or you’re young parents or old parents so don’t underestimate the rahmah. Nabi s.a.w did an analogy of Allah’s love though there’s no analogy of Allah’s attributes but just to explain things. He said that love of Allah is greater than the love of a mother for her child. SubhanAllah! Do you know any love greater than the love of a mother? Of course not! This shows that Allah’s love is greater than any type of love. But it also shows the other side because it shows that a mother’s love is so important. Our teenagers need love more than the children. Seriously! Ali r.a said for the first seven years let them play. From 7-14 teach them, give them adab. And after 14 be their friend. How many of you can say that your parents are your friends? Best friends? A beautiful proof is the attitude of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.

If you give them education and money you think it’s enough? Sorry, it’s not. They need your love. Because only that is what will make Islam penetrate your child’s heart. We’ve seen the results of education and money in Pakistan, if we don’t give them love there’s nothing. So love them, parents! A courageous man is soft of heart. We know the hadith when Nabi s.a.w was kissing his children, one Arab came and said I never kiss my children, he said the one who is not merciful to others, Allah will not be merciful to him.

How could I teach my non-Muslim dad about Islam when he has rahmah much more than Muslims? What would I say? ‘Sorry dad they don’t follow Islam although it’s a great religion that they have?’

Let’s make a resolution here and now that we will be more generous with the words ‘I love you’ and use them for our children every day, inshaAllah. Hug them, let them know. Just taking care of their needs is not enough!

P.S. Express your love for your friends and family and acquaintances as well. Make it flow. Let’s drop our superficial, egotistical attitudes and love each other, make it a tradition in our ummah! <3
(This is not for non-mehrams, of course). :p

Enjoy the video: 

Wassalam,
Hajrah. :)

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