Light Up Your Life With Islam

Posts tagged ‘love’

The Old Man and the Woman

As I was walking towards the runway from the boarding lounge, I couldn’t help but notice the very aged couple in front of me. Hardly being able to walk yet supporting each other, the husband quietly adjusted the warm stole on his wife’s shoulders. I smiled to myself and moved on towards the gate, not seeing them again until our plane landed at the destined airport.

After going through the usual procedure, I was standing next to my bags, waiting for the luggage when I saw a worker pushing two wheelchairs across the slippery floor. He stopped right in front of me and I saw the same old man and woman in a wheelchair each. The worker helped the old man out of his seat and went to get his bag leaving him standing there. The old man walked slowly over to the other wheelchair and bending his already bent back some more, gave his wrinkled feeble hand to his wife and tried to pull her up unsuccessfully. By that time, the worker returned and helped his wife out of the wheelchair. The husband told her respectfully to “go sit down”. She responded with equal respect and said “it’s okay, don’t worry about me”.

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In the meantime, my luggage had arrived and after collecting my bags, I left the airport. But my heart was touched by what I had seen. I wondered to myself, what had kept the spark alive for this old couple? Why is it that today young spouses can’t bear the other’s face just a couple of years into marriage? I remembered their respectful looks and tones towards each other and I knew I had found my answer.

Indeed, it is respect that we lack today. We wait for love in the form of a missed heartbeat, tingly feelings, sentimental songs and rainbows and butterflies. But it never happens, and even if it would, it would get tiresome after a while. We forget that love is not a temporary phase of excitement rather long-term solace and loyalty built by giving respect and compassion. Unless we lay the foundations of this very basic family unit correctly, how can we expect to construct a building on it free of cracks and flaws?

May Allah grant us wisdom to deal with our spouses and families in the best possible manner and may He make them the coolness of our eyes. Ameen.

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Of Memories and Affections

Bismillah. 

Five days into Eid and I still remember the two pretty white sheep that my brother and his wife sacrificed this time. 

They had come to our home almost a year ago. Cuddly little things they were when they first arrived. My nephews and I used to play with them in the garden. In a matter of few months, they had become fully grown sheep. I recall when their wool was shorn and we used to marvel and laugh at how different they looked. Throughout the year, it was actually only a few times that I had spent time with them. And yet, I miss them even when Eid has passed. 

Usually, our mind doesn’t wander back to our sacrificial animals so frequently but just those few moments of association had built a bond not to be broken easily. Because humans are made to love and have affection, this is how they’re created. 

  
Imagine if this creation of love and affection is told to sacrifice, not sheep, but his own son. How would he ever relent to that? The bond of humans with their pets is strong. The bond of humans with other fellow humans is stronger. The bond of humans with other people who they know is stronger still. The bond of humans with their relatives is even stronger. And the bond of man with his kids is incomparable to any other bond in this world. This makes the bidding of sacrificing one’s own son seem odd and out of place. And yet, there was this man who not only accepted and obeyed but also did the deed with all his heart in it. 

Did he not love his son enough? Yes, he did. Maybe even more than usual. Because his child was not your usual everyday son but one who was obedient and of the best character. Who could help not adoring such a kid, let alone his father? 

How could he do this then? Surely, it was because the One who had commanded to do this act was more beloved to this man than any other human on this earth. Most beloved, because that’s how great is the One who told him to sacrifice his own son. So great that he did not have to question. This man knew His Wisdom, His Love, His Mercy, His Greatness surpasses all others. Because He is the Creator of that man and of all mankind. 

I wonder if we also know and believe in the Greatness of our Creator, what would we be willing to sacrifice? Would we sacrifice our time, energies, efforts, resources, desires, negative thoughts and lifestyles for Him? But perhaps, we do not know Him truly…  

  

The Shield 

Bismillah. 

One of the purest love that exists in this world is that of parents for their children. They love their kids selflessly and would go to any length to protect and benefit them. They’d even sacrifice their life for them. What could be greater than that?

If a child becomes ill, the father and mother would do whatever is humanly possible for them to do. Everyone gives their own opinion and advice regarding the child’s illness and they listen to each one hungrily, because who knows what will work? And same goes for all the matters of life. They want the best for their offspring. 

Well, here’s the good news! 

  

I’m about to share a formula which is 100% tried and tested by the prophets themselves. Imagine that! 


Sahih Bukhari, 3371:


Narrated Ibn ‘Abbas:

The Prophet (ﷺ) used to seek Refuge with Allah for Al-Hasan and Al-Husain and say: “Your forefather (i.e. Abraham) used to seek Refuge with Allah for Ishmael and Isaac by reciting the following: ‘O Allah! I seek Refuge with Your Perfect Words from every devil and from poisonous pests and from every evil, harmful, envious eye.’ “

The dua in Arabic: 

أَعُوذُ بِكَلِمَاتِ اللَّهِ التَّامَّةِ مِنْ كُلِّ شَيْطَانٍ وَهَامَّةٍ، وَمِنْ كُلِّ عَيْنٍ لاَمَّةٍ ‏”‏‏.‏

Let’s add this dua in our routinely supplications for protection of our beloved ones. You can make this dua for them whether they’re with you or live far away. It will benefit inshaAllah. :)

Love Deprived

Bismillah.

“No one loves me”. “Nobody really cares”. One of the most common claims of teenagers nowadays. Many end up committing suicide just because of that. Born to single parents or belonging to a broken home or having both parents slaving at a 9-5 job, kids often feel ignored or deprived of love. These same kids then grow up to be delinquents or somehow psychologically disturbed adults. Developed countries spend billions of dollars on crime control.

Many people who have anger, frustration or other behavioural issues are now known to be suffering from some kind of complex. If you look at it, these complexes too are born out of insecurities that stem from lovelessness, lack of proper attention etc. These insecurities end up turning the defensive mode on, hence giving rise to the culture of individualism, which brings forth the “I don’t care” and “this is my life” attitude.

Love can do wonders to people. Life coaches and healing practitioners know that and so many books are out there in the market that teach you how to earn love of parents, spouses, colleagues etc. Some of these books actually have good practical advice.

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However, at the end of the day, we live with humans who will hurt us and ignore us and lack somewhere in the love they have for us. It does get tiring running after this person and that after a while. That is the time when people give up, start cheating on their partners or break out in jealousy. What then is the solution?

What we need to understand is that a building constructed on weak foundations will eventually fall. If the foundation of your building is strong then advice from different experts and their experiences will help, otherwise it will not. Don’t sweat, the way out is so simple that you will be surprised!

Here you go: Please one, not all. Rest will be taken care of.
The question is which one?

We find the answer of this in Sahih Bukhari, 3209:

Narrated Abu Huraira:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “If Allah loves a person, He calls Gabriel saying, ‘Allah loves so and-so; O Gabriel! Love him.’ Gabriel would love him and make an announcement amongst the inhabitants of the Heaven. ‘Allah loves so-and-so, therefore you should love him also,’ and so all the inhabitants of the Heaven would love him, and then he is granted the pleasure of the people on the earth.”

If you strive to please your Creator, eventually people of this earth will come to accept and love you. And hey, what more could you want? Imagine your parents, spouse, kids, neighbours, colleagues loving you!

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So now you don’t need to lose your focus by thinking, ‘should I side with my boss or the colleague who helped me last week?’ ‘Should I make my mother-in-law love me or should I exert my efforts towards my sister-in-law?’ Instead, you can focus on pleasing the only One in peace Who will never fail you, never be unjust and never get angry without a reason. <3

Now that we have a goal, here are some tips and tricks on how to please Allah:

Belief and good deeds – Allah says in Maryam 96: “Indeed, those who have believed and done righteous deeds – the Most Merciful will appoint for them affection.”

Voluntary good deeds (nafal) – “…..And the most beloved thing with which My slave comes nearer to Me, is what I have enjoined upon him; and My slave keeps on coming closer to Me through performing Nawafil (voluntary prayers or doing extra deeds besides what is obligatory) until I love him,…..” [Al-Bukhari]

You can find many more ways to earn His love in the Book of Allah and the narrations of the Prophet Muhammad ﷺ. May Allah give us the tawfeeq to earn His love inshaAllah. :)

LOVE, at its best <3

Assalamu’alaikum,
Bismillah.

Whattey title, hm? Brings a nice fluttery feeling in your heart when you read the word. But then actually feeling it… Sigh! Its beyond words. So beautiful.

There is a certain kind of love which, when you go through, is at once wonderful and unique. Like no other love. And love of any kind is felt only when you know that person and it increases manifold if that person has been kind to you and has done a lot for you. Right?

I fell in love all over again with one such person, so much so, that I wanted to share it. :)

Unfortunately, people say that they don’t feel much love for that person, whom I consider so lovable. I think the reason might be because they do not even know what he was like, what was his character, what were his words. You just want to hang on to your loved one’s words, don’t you? And repeat them over and over again with a smile on your lips. And if those words are for you… Boy! You’re in the seventh heaven of delight. But what if you don’t even know what his words were? Wouldn’t that be a pity? :(

Yes, I love him with all my heart because he taught me how to live, he taught me how to walk, how to talk, how to eat, how to sleep, how to keep relations with my parents, my relatives, my friends, my enemies. He taught me how to think, he taught me how to be content, how to pray, how to deal with sadness, how to deal with illness. He taught me how to feel, how to smile, how to cry, how to deal with private stuff. Why did he do all that? Because he loved me. He loved me more than my own biological parents. He loved me so much that he wanted me to be saved from the biggest failure. He wanted to save me from being thrown into the Big Fire. The Fire that my very close ones don’t even care about. But he did. The Fire that will burn forever and will only increase, never decrease. The Fire that will be pitch dark and scary and there will be much pain and loneliness and yelling in it. He wanted to save me from that. He gave me tips that would save me from that biggest disaster. He prayed for me. He cried for me.

Should I still not feel his love? Do you not feel his love? Yes, I am talking about my beloved Prophet Muhammad 

You are supposed to love him. If you do not, then get anxious. Your faith is in danger. You cannot be a Muslim until you love him more than anything. Get to know him. There is no way you can’t love him once you know what he did for you!

Read his ahadith, read Sahih Bukhari and you’ll hang onto each word. He taught you every single thing that you would ever need to know in your life about yourself, about others, about life itself.

Don’t you yearn to see his face shining like the sun and moon? :)

He’s not a thing of the past, only sincere for His Companions at that time. He loved you, the very person reading this.

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) recited the verse about Ibraaheem (peace be upon him), “O my Lord! They have indeed led astray many among mankind. But whoso follows me, he verily, is of me” [Ibraaheem 14:36], and the verse in which ‘Eesa said, “If You punish them, they are Your slaves, and if You forgive them, verily, You, only You, are the All‑Mighty, the All‑Wise” [al-Maa’idah 5:118]. Then he raised his hands and said: “O Allaah, my ummah, my ummah.” Allaah, may He be glorified and exalted, said: “O Jibreel, go to Muhammad, although your Lord knows best, and ask him why he is weeping.” So Jibreel (peace be upon him) went to him and asked him, and the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told him what he said, although He knows best. Allaah said: “O Jibreel, go to Muhammad and say: “I will make you pleased concerning your ummah and not displeased.”

One sign of his compassion and love towards his ummah was that he prayed for more blessing and goodness especially for those who believed in him and followed him without seeing him.

It was narrated from Anas ibn Maalik (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said:
“Glad tidings to the one who believed in me and saw me, and sevenfold glad tidings to the one who believed in me but did not see me.”

It was narrated from Abu Hurayrah (may Allaah be pleased with him) that the Messenger of Allaah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) went out to the graveyard and said:
“Peace be upon the abode of believing people, and if Allaah wills we will join you soon. Would that I could see our brothers.” They said: Are we not your brothers, O Messenger of Allaah? He said: “You are my companions. Our brothers are those who have not come yet. I will reach the Cistern before them.” They said: O Messenger of Allaah, how will you recognize those of your ummah who came after you? He said: “Do you not see that if a man has a horse that has a white blaze and white feet among horses that are all black, will he not recognize his horse?” They said: Of course. He said: “They will come to me with bright faces and limbs (like the white markings of a horse) because of the traces of wudoo’, and I will reach the Cistern before them.”

The scholars have said that the wrath of Allaah and the Fire of Hell are the things that we fear the most, and we cannot be saved from them except at the hands of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him). The pleasure of Allaah and the garden of Paradise are the things that we want the most, but we cannot attain them except at the hands of the Messenger (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) referred to the former when he said: “The likeness of me and you is that of a man who lit a fire and grasshoppers and moths started falling into it, and he tried to push them away. I am seizing your waistbands and trying to pull you away from the Fire but you are trying to get away from me.”

See how much he loved us? But do you want to know what’s the cream of his love for us? He was given a free dua (prayer) that would be accepted. And he saved that for us! He will use that on the Day when we will be all alone and empty-handed and in need of someone’s help desperately. And at that time he will make dua for us. Isn’t that love, at its best? Imagine yourself getting the opportunity of a dua that would necessarily be accepted, would you ever save it for people who would disobey you (because intercession will be needed most by the disobedient ones) and you never even saw them? Never!!

Abu Hurairah r.a narrates from Rasool-Allah s.a.w, “Every Prophet had a special duaa which is accepted in the court of Allah. All Prophets were in quick in their duaas. On the day of Judgment, for the intercession of my Ummah, I have saved my duaa. My duaa will reach to every person in my ummah, who did not make any partners with Allah.” (Muslim)

Read the full account of his saved dua for us on the Day of Judgement and how it will happen,

It was narrated that Anas ibn Maalik said: Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told us: “When the Day of Resurrection comes, the people will surge with each other like waves. They will come to Adam and say, ‘Intercede for us with your Lord.’ He will say, ‘I am not fit for that. Go to Ibraaheem for he is the Close Friend of the Most Merciful.’ So they will go to Ibraaheem, but he will say, ‘I am not fit for that. Go to Moosa for he is the one to whom Allaah spoke directly.’ So they will go to Moosa but he will say, ‘I am not fit for that. Go to ‘Eesa for he is a soul created by Allaah and His Word.’ So they will go to ‘Eesa but he will say, ‘I am not fit for that. Go to Muhammad (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him).’ So they will come to me and I will say, I am fit for that.’ Then I will ask my Lord for permission and He will give me permission, and He will inspire me with words of praise with which I will praise Him, words that I do not know now. So I will praise Him with those words of praise and I will fall down prostrate before Him. He will say, ‘O Muhammad, raise your head. Speak and intercession will be granted to you, ask and you will be given, intercede and your intercession will be accepted.’ I will say, ‘O Lord, my ummah, my ummah!’ He will say, ‘Go and bring forth everyone in whose heart there is faith the weight of a barley-grain.’ So I will go and do that. Then I will come back and praise Him with those words of praise and I will fall down prostrate before Him. He will say, ‘O Muhammad, raise your head. Speak and intercession will be granted to you, ask and you will be given, intercede and your intercession will be accepted.’ I will say, ‘O Lord, my ummah, my ummah!’ He will say, ‘Go and bring forth everyone in whose heart there is faith the weight of a small ant or a mustard-seed.’ So I will go and do that. Then I will come back and praise Him with those words of praise and I will fall down prostrate before Him. He will say, ‘O Muhammad, raise your head. Speak and intercession will be granted to you, ask and you will be given, intercede and your intercession will be accepted.’ I will say, ‘O Lord, my ummah, my ummah!’ He will say, ‘Go and bring forth from the Fire everyone in whose heart there is faith the weight of the lightest, lightest grain of mustard-seed.’ So I will go and bring them forth.”

Remember that intercession will be only for those who do not associate partners with Allah and believe in Prophet Muhammad 

Love him now, as much as you can! He did so much for you. And send peace and blessings on him.

Wassalam,
Hajrah.

P.S. To know the full details of intercession, read here.

P.P.S. For convenience I did not insert the references into the post, you can check them here, here and here.

P.P.P.S. Read Pen Portrait of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.

Love & Rahmah – Revive it, Parents!

Salam,
Bismillah.

There was a very moving reminder given by brother Hamza Andreas Tzortzis at SIST on January 8, 2012. I would like to share it with you.

This is the summary of what he talked about (these may not be the exact words but I’m still going to use the first form so that it can be related to easily, they are almost the exact words though):
My dad used to say ‘I love you’ to me every single day. (His dad is a non-Muslim). Wallahi I can guarantee you that some of you have never heard the word love from your parents. We’re Muslims, this is our agenda… Rahmah! Ibn-al-Qayyim said where you see Islam you should see mercy. And I guarantee you some of you in this room don’t even have loving relationships with your own parents. This is not the relationship of the sunnah, of parenting. Children have to obey their parents. It’s a must. It’s an ‘ibadah. But don’t forget the emphasis Islam puts on rahmah in relationships. What does Allah say about Nabi s.a.w? If you didn’t show love to them they would run away from you. Think about this. Think about did I say I love him?

‘I love you.’ Such a beautiful words. Its sunnah. What did the Prophet s.a.w say? If you love someone tell them. Do we not love our children? Of course we do. So why don’t we say it? If we don’t have rahmah in our house then according to developmental psychology you have nothing no matter what else you give your children. We don’t show love, we don’t show rahmah. Why? Remember it’s all about parenting. And you’re future parents or you’re young parents or old parents so don’t underestimate the rahmah. Nabi s.a.w did an analogy of Allah’s love though there’s no analogy of Allah’s attributes but just to explain things. He said that love of Allah is greater than the love of a mother for her child. SubhanAllah! Do you know any love greater than the love of a mother? Of course not! This shows that Allah’s love is greater than any type of love. But it also shows the other side because it shows that a mother’s love is so important. Our teenagers need love more than the children. Seriously! Ali r.a said for the first seven years let them play. From 7-14 teach them, give them adab. And after 14 be their friend. How many of you can say that your parents are your friends? Best friends? A beautiful proof is the attitude of Prophet Muhammad s.a.w.

If you give them education and money you think it’s enough? Sorry, it’s not. They need your love. Because only that is what will make Islam penetrate your child’s heart. We’ve seen the results of education and money in Pakistan, if we don’t give them love there’s nothing. So love them, parents! A courageous man is soft of heart. We know the hadith when Nabi s.a.w was kissing his children, one Arab came and said I never kiss my children, he said the one who is not merciful to others, Allah will not be merciful to him.

How could I teach my non-Muslim dad about Islam when he has rahmah much more than Muslims? What would I say? ‘Sorry dad they don’t follow Islam although it’s a great religion that they have?’

Let’s make a resolution here and now that we will be more generous with the words ‘I love you’ and use them for our children every day, inshaAllah. Hug them, let them know. Just taking care of their needs is not enough!

P.S. Express your love for your friends and family and acquaintances as well. Make it flow. Let’s drop our superficial, egotistical attitudes and love each other, make it a tradition in our ummah! <3
(This is not for non-mehrams, of course). :p

Enjoy the video: 

Wassalam,
Hajrah. :)

Daughters of Islam!

Salam,
Bismillah.

On November 27, 2011 I got to attend ‘Youth Commemorates: Daughters of Islam’, an event organized by Youth Club, and heard an inspiring talk on the said theme by Dr. Farhat Hashmi.
In this post I’ll be sharing a few pointers inshaAllah. Read on.

Everything is made for a purpose. Everything is a product of something. The milk that we drink, it has so many benefits (not to mention that some people don’t like it), who manufactures it? A cow.
Similarly, the examples go on and on.

Allah SWT created this earth and then made Adam A.S from His own hands! But he was a single human being on this vast land and so he felt lonely. Thus Allah SWT created a woman, Hawwa, from Adam’s rib. Why? So that she could be his companion. This is the real purpose of a woman: to give company!

She is a companion because she was created out of man’s rib. If she was made from man’s head or feet, she would have been too high-headed or down trodden. :p

After Hawwa A.S, Quran talks about  Nooh A.S’s wife. She was not a believer. Nooh A.S preached for 950 years but his own wife did not pay heed.
Thus we get the lesson that it’s not necessary for a pious man to get a pious wife or a pious woman to get a pious husband. Keep good expectations from Allah but if you don’t get it, know that it is best for you (decreed by Allah). Nooh A.S didn’t divorce his wife even though she was not a believer.

Next we get to know about Sara A.S, wife of a prophet (Ibrahim A.S) and mother of a prophet (Ishaq A.S). She was a great woman.

Then there is Ibrahim A.S’s other wife, Hajar or Hajrah A.S. She was left alone in the middle of a desert with a baby to look after. Why? Because that land had to be prepared for Nabi S.A.W and a woman was chosen for the task. Today thousands of people relive her example and commemorate her by running between Safaa and Marwaa.
When Ibrahim A.S returned, she didn’t complain that why did you leave me all alone with a kid. Instead, when Ibrahim A.S said that he had to take Isma’eel A.S (her son) to be sacrificed in the way of Allah…she and her son were ready. Who had done Isma’eel A.S’s upbringing  in such a way that he was prepared? His mother! And think of that mother who let her own son be taken away for sacrifice without a word of complaint. (Close your eyes and imagine for a moment!!).

Then comes the wife of Lut A.S. She was not a believer and her end was opposite from that of her husband.

Then there was Musa A.S’s mother, who floated her own son in the river in a box. Imagine her situation! And then Musa A.S’s sister followed him. He was received by Fir’aun and Aasia A.S. When he went to Madyan, he encountered a girl walking with ‘haya’ (the most important characteristic in a woman..and a man as well).

Then there was the wife of ‘Imran who gave her daughter, Maryam, in the way of Allah and made a sincere du’a that was rendered effective in her future progeny.

And Maryam A.S herself, who gave birth to a son, was a single parent but raised her child courageously and in the best possible way.

And then Aamna, whose husband had died and she became the single parent of Muhammad S.A.W. And Haleema, who raised Nabi S.A.W.

Then there comes Khadija R.A, who supported Nabi S.A.W when there was no one else and struggled with her life and wealth in the way of establishment of Islam. Nabi S.A.W loved her so much that years later when he heard her sister’s voice, he started as if it was Khadija’s. He S.A.W used to send sacrificial meat to her friends as well. This is true love that does not die with the death of the person. :)

‘Aisha R.A, who was a master in hadith, medicine and ‘ilm of ansaab. Sahaba used to say when we couldn’t understand something even from Abubakr and ‘Umar R.A, we went to ‘Aisha R.A and we were satisfied. Such was the power of her speech and her grip on knowledge. She taught for almost 48 years after the death of Nabi S.A.W. Many great Companions R.A were her students.

Hafsa R.A was a wise and pious lady.

‘Umar R.A’s wife ‘Aatiqa was a great woman too, indeed.

Umme Hani was that woman whose house was declared a refuge during the conquest of Makkah.

Fatima R.A, Ali R.A’s wife, was a wonderful housewife and brought up her kids (Hassan and Hussayn R.A) perfectly.

There are scores of amazing ladies who have huge contributions for Islam. Their lives are an example for us to look up to. Here only a few names are mentioned because going into details would take too long. Search and read about their lives and relate yourself with them.

The major lesson that we get is women are best suited for their decreed job. The problem comes when they want to be like men and thus end up the wrong way. Their lives become hollow from inside because they’re not doing what they’re supposed to do. So recognize your role, accept it and be the best in the situation appointed by Allah for you. Do not underestimate the power of women. They can influence lives and bring about that much needed ‘big’ change!

Wassalam,
Hajrah. :)

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